On Your Own Again: Starting Over After 50 You

You have made it to 50 only to find yourself on your own, once again. After sharing bank accounts and household bills with your partner, you now have to fend for yourself. Whether it is from divorce or the loss of your partner, this is a difficult time for you and thinking about finances is probably the last thing you want to do, right?

When the time is right, you will have to grapple the thoughts that may be starting to niggle at you. Now, what do you do? How do you get yourself back on top of things on your own?

According to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, divorce is one of the most stressful events people go through in a lifetime, second only to the death of a spouse. On top of your loss, the thought of starting over can cause anxiety and feelings of frustration.

From the time we hear those words, “I want a divorce,” we have to figure out how to keep ourselves functioning emotionally and physically during this overwhelming and exhausting time. Many of us are barely getting out of bed everyday.

Initially, it may seem overwhelming, but it is so important to get on stable financial footing or it is very hard to recover in other ways. Depending on how much financial security you had before your circumstances changed, you may have to continue working for much longer than you planned. You may need to leave your family home and find an apartment or downsize to a much smaller house for yourself and any children still at home.

Some women end up with little retirement safety net. That’s especially true if the woman spent most of her married life staying home and taking care of the kids and things at home.

But, know this – many women have done remarkable things when forced to start from scratch. You just never know—it could be the best thing that ever happened to you.

Firstly, You Must Choose To Thrive Again.

Against all odds, you will survive this. In fact, there will come a time, where you will feel like yourself again and depending on your situation, you may feel as though you have really come to life for the first time in decades. Mindset is vital. You can thrive again, if you choose to push through the initial setbacks.

Back To Work

It’s time to either focus on your career or go back to work. If you’ve been out of work for a while, take what you can for starters, and then, start thinking about a job you will really love. This is far more important than you think. Starting over means working longer in life, so if you find work you truly love, you will never work a day in your life. Think about the things you enjoy doing so much that you lose track of time. That’s a great indication of your passion. Take the steps towards work that is aligned with your passion.

Tighten

Plan to live happily on less money and keep your required expenses right down. You need to save as much as you can as quickly as possible. Let go of the things that cost you money and replace them with affordable options. Get the economy car, locate low-cost living options, ditch underutilized subscription or membership services and cook at home instead of eating out. Shop around for utility services, revise you grocery list and get savvy with making your money work for you. Tightening the budget can feel rotten, so it’s important to add things to your week, such as, walks on the beach with friends (great for your health and mental health) picnics are a cheap moral booster or movie nights at home.

Consider Buying a House

If and when you are ready to consider investing, buying a house can protect you from rising rents. If you are able to buy, keep your mortgage payment affordable, leaving you enough money left over to continue saving and cover ongoing upkeep costs. Consider looking for easy maintenance properties, easy access (avoid loads of stairs) and be aware of body corporate fees.

Once the dust has settled and things are looking up, it’s a good idea to contact a financial advisor to point you in the right direction.

In the middle of all of this mess, you will ask yourselves, “Will I ever get over this?” “Will I ever really be happy again?” “Is surviving starting over after 50 possible?” The answer is yes! Absolutely! But, your recovery is up to you.